Bride Wars (2009)

@IMDb

Yes, I sat through all of it, Kate Hudson works wonders for my concentration. It is a silly movie, stupid even, but it deserves some proper femslashing. It’s a movie about two BFFs who are about the get married, but a mix-up in planning causes them to be pitted against each other in one huge bitch-fest.

It is a movie about the fulfilling of the heterosexual norm of marriage and children, but sometimes during the run of the movie that is incredibly easy to forget. First of all the two leads have great chemistry together and that works a long way on its own. Then there are a number of scenes that taken out of context look a lot more like one big anti-prop 8 campaign than anything else.

Not to mention that the outline of the story would make a great Uber. On the one hand you have the aggressive corporate lawyer with a need to control and on the other hand the meek middle school teacher with a need to please. Despite their differences they share an incredible strong connection and mean everything to each other. All the story needs is an alternative alternative ending.

There are too many meaningful looks and lingering touches for me to list them all, but some of the scenes worth mentioning are the following:

• The opening where the two play bride (a young Liv) and groom (a young Emma), and marry each other.
• The better-off Liv buying clothes (read spoiling) Emma for no real reason other than she wants to.
• The mentioning of the two having lived together.
• Emma chasing Liv through her apartment and tackling her to the couch where she ends up sitting on top of the blonde. After which they pull apart and there’s some panting involved.
• The wedding planning montage which is completely devoid of all male and only shows the two planning a wedding together.
• The dance-off where the two are handcuffed to each other at the hen party.
• Emma falling apart because of the feud with Liv and confesses, “How I feel?..I’m so confused”.
• Liv receiving a blessing from Emma’s dad at the day of her wedding and as he walks away softly whispering, “He’s such a good man…Emma is so much like him”.
• The longing looks of sadness they give each other before they head off to their separate weddings.
• Emma running down the aisle and attacking Liv. The two end up rolling around on the floor fighting to be on top. Spent they collapse on the floor next to each other.
• Emma breaking up with her man and afterwards take Liv down the aisle.

Anyhow, words only say so much so rather than to waste more of them I decided to retell the movie in screencaps. Here you go, Bride Wars the Alternative Story;





























Like I said, looks a lot like an anti-prop H8 campaign, don't you think?

Conclusion
The entire movie is about these two women and their relationship. Everything comes back to that one true relationship that goes beyond any other and the loss of that relationship that causes them both to fall apart completely.

The movie was pointless, but squint a little and put heterosexuality on hold and suddenly it's a tribute to same-sex marriages. From a subtext POV it is definitely recommended, but that's the only POV it is recommended from.